I’m back from a family vacation involving regular dunkings into freezing rapids and screaming myself hoarse on a zipline. Which basically means I didn’t have the time to scour the web and/or wrack my brain for anything funny (seriously, fainting takes a lot out of you).
I did, however, remember to bring Drag-Queen Cleo to the North Georgia mountains. And she had, as usual, something to say about everything:
Upon finding a cow, the queen proceeded to lecture it
on the value of “adorning one’s horns with gold.”
A garland of flowers might help with that
bovine scent,” she also suggested. The cow tried to eat her.
Mistaking a barn cat for the Sphinx, she again
went into lecture mode. “Look,” she said. “I love you and all
that but you have GOT to come up with a better riddle, m’kay?
That ‘What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon
and three in the evening‘ crap is so TIRED. Liven it up! Go
for something like, ‘How many queens does it
take to rule the world? One! Me!”
Drag-Queen Cleo refused to go rafting with us (“Honey,
I don’t DO water trips unless they’re on my golden barge.”)
However, she was not above giving the photographer
tips on improving her work. (“Go for the drama,” she advised.
“If there’s not enough blood, I’ll gladly have one my
guards spear the boatman for you next time…”)
Drag-Queen Cleo refused
to accompany us on the ziplines.
That’s us!
And that’s me deciding to jump straight
into the rapids, saving myself the
trouble of falling outta the boat.
Ah … but would the real Cleopatra refuse the challenge, the fun, the rush of the Slide For Life?
I think she might well be up for that, particularly if in doing so she could ‘one up’ her lover Antony.
Of course, we will never know, but I suspect she would.
I’m with Cleo on the I-don’t-do-water thing! Mostly because I’m lousy at swimming but great at drowning. *glug glug*
@Narukami–great point. And I agree, she would probably only go for it if she could’ve outdone Mark Antony. But alas, there is no Mark Antony action figure!
@Gail–I have to admit, the water was refreshing!
Looks like a great trip!!! Silly Cleo. 🙂
No Mark Antony Action Figure?
Actually …
There is one custom figure —
http://www.jumbokaggra.co.uk/mark.html
However, I think there must be a better one floating about (perhaps made out of a Barbie?). I will keep looking — Your Cleo needs her lover.
You jumped into the rapids? Was the helmet on your head not a clue that such behavior might be dangerous? Yikesy.
That zip line looks fun, though. I’d never do it, but it still looks like fun.
@Sally–lol. That was a designated jumping in spot so everyone on the trip took a little dip for fun. We jumped in after the drop so it was completely safe.
You can never go wrong with a cow picture!
But next time, I want to see Cleo clinging to that helmet as you take the plunge. Nothing says fun like a drag queen strapped to your head!
Lets hope the cow’s not too horny?
@Cathy–“Nothing says fun like a drag queen strapped to your head.” Hahahahah!
@Paul–I’d give you grief about your corny “horny” line but I can’t because every time I look at your adorable profile pic, I melt.
Thanks Vicky and I’m sure there’s a pussy joke in there somewhere?
We totally need a Mark Antony action figure. With detachable Roman armour.
Paul, you’re a naughty boy. 🙂